Writing vows can be daunting for anyone as they are deeply personal. Not to mention there can be a lot of pressure to make sure that they are perfect! Instead of feeling overwhelmed with where to start with how to write vows, this vow writing process and template will help you craft meaningful vows that you’ll be excited to share on your wedding day. By the end of this blog post, you’ll be able to articulate your feelings and thoughts into your finalized wedding vows.
Let’s get started!
How to Write Your Vows for Your Elopement or Wedding
Here’s what that will look like!
Step 1: Brainstorm Ideas
To brainstorm ideas, write your top 2-3 favorite things about your partner and that can help get your creativity going as a reminder of why you love your person. These can be physical traits (like their eyes or their smile), or they can be more emotional and sentimental about how they make you feel safe, heard, and understood.
So, grab a pen and a piece of paper, or open up a blank Google doc to jot down your notes and ideas!
Here are some prompts to get you started.
Wedding Vow Prompts
- What are you thankful for in regard to your partner?
- Write in the words “I love you” somewhere because that’s truly the most important part
- What was your first date, and what were your first impressions of your partner?
- Write about funny stories in the past and memories that make you laugh.
- What drew you in to your partner?
- When did you know you loved them?
- What are you most excited about spending your lives together? What are your goals together for your future?
- What are your best adventures together so far?
- What are some inside jokes between the two of you? (This is especially good for private vows or self-officiated ceremonies with no guests to hear)
And then to wrap it up, it can be simple and sweet, or you can even end your vows with a favorite and meaningful quote.
Step 2: Organize and Edit
Once you have all your ideas written out, go back through and organize things a bit more! Rewrite parts you want to so that it all flows nicely.
Don’t be afraid to write several drafts and take a few days (or even weeks!) to mull over your vows – they’re THAT important and can take time to feel right.
Step 3: Sleep on It
With every draft you finalize, come back to it the next day with fresh eyes. Remember, you don’t have to be a perfect writer! These vows are coming from your heart, so don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share this intimate moment together.
Step 4: Read Them Out Loud
As you’re writing your drafts, read them out loud! You want your vows to sound like you and include phrases and words that you use all of the time. If there are any words that keep tripping you up or phrases that sound clunky, don’t be afraid to change it up! You want your vows to flow off your tongue easily.
Then, time how long they take you to read from start to finish. 3-5 minutes is a good time goal to have, especially if you’re nervous!
How to Write Vows: A Wedding Vow Template
If you’re still feeling stuck on where to start or feel overwhelmed with how to piece together all of your brainstormed ideas, here is a simple wedding template you can use to layout your vows.
- Tell your partner you love them. Describe why or keep it short and sweet.
- Explain how you’re feeling! Share your thoughts about getting married, how you feel about your partner, or profound feelings you might not have shared before.
- Compliment your partner!
- Describe a memory you share that has brought you to this day, describes your feelings, or articulates your relationship.
- Share some dreams or state how you are excited and prepared for the future together.
- Say some actual vows with “I vow” or “I promise” throughout!
How to Elevate Your Wedding Vows
Once you have your final vows, handwriting your vows into vow books not only elevates your experience exchanging vows, but it also enhances your photos as well. Pieces of paper and phones aren’t terrible for photos, but vow books make your ceremony look SO much better.
You can buy customized vow books with your names, dates, and wedding colors! It can be a fun detail that’s part of elopement planning. Etsy is a great place to find custom vow books.
But hey, I also give all my couples a set of vow books as part of their client welcome gift, so at the very least, you’ll have some from me!
Tips for Reading Your Vows on Your Elopement Day
Now that your vows are written and are prepared in a vow book, it’s time for you to read your vows during your ceremony! As an elopement photographer who has witnessed many vows, you’ll want to remember these two things to enjoy reading your vows instead of feeling anxiously rushed through them.
Read slower than you think to and enunciate. This will allow you to feel present in the moment, and you can confidently know that your partner is able to hear and understand everything that you’re saying.
Connect with your partner during your vows. Hold their hand, look them in the eyes, and truly connect with them in those moments.
And remember that as long as your vows come from the heart, that’s all that matters!
How to Self-Officiate Your Elopement Ceremony
Many of the couples that I get to photograph choose to write their vows AND self-officiate their elopement ceremony. This means no one has to be present at the ceremony other than the two of you! This gives you the freedom and flexibility to elope anywhere, anytime, without needing to decide in advance.
If you’re interested in self-officiating your elopement ceremony, this blog post walks you through the process! You can check it out here: Self-Officiating in Washington DC: What is It & How Do You Do It?
Elopement Planning Resources
Did you find this blog post helpful? You can find more elopement planning resources on my blog! I’m an elopement photographer because I believe that the way you get married matters and everyone deserves to have an incredible wedding experience. With my free elopement planning resources, you can plan a wedding adventure you’ll still be raving about 50 years from now!
If you enjoyed this blog post, here are some more posts I think you’ll find helpful:
Unique Elopement Ideas to Include Your Family and Friends
Elopement Planning: How to Plan a 12-Hour Elopement in Washington DC
The Ultimate Elopement Packing List for Your East Coast Adventure Wedding
First Look vs Getting Ready Together: How to Decide Which Option is Best for You
